Subscribe Feed (RSS)Guinness Extra Stout (Original)
October 1st, 2008 by Aaron Goldfarb | Filed under Brewer: Guinness, Country: Ireland, Grade: A-, Style: Stout.
6% ABV bottled
An only-drinks-macros-except-for-Guinness-(which-is-actually-kind-of-a-macro-too) friend picked up several sixers of Guinness’s Extra Stout for some afternoon football watching. After sip one of bottle number one from six-pack number one, he had a look of “What the fuck is this shit?!” come across his face. Clearly he expected the creamy, fluffy, uncarbonated, highly-drinkable, biteless quasi-stout he had been drinking for years on draught.
Little did he realize–just like most people don’t–that there’s actually a second version of Guinness, their Extra Stout. He was disgusted, the Extra Stout was far too potent and full-bodied for him. Fine with me, Extra Stout is superior to the “real” Guinness as he called it. Funny thing is, Extra Stout is actually the “real” Guinness*, the Guinness that’s been around since the days of Joyce and the other drunk Irish writers that no one reads any more but everyone has posters of in their bars. That nitrogen-infused milkshake shit was only invented in the 1960’s. I’m being a little harsh though. I don’t actually mind Guinness Draught and still have it from time to time, but it’s nowhere near as good as the Extra Stout.
Extra stout has no nitro-carbonation like the Draught does (both on draught and in it’s annoying widget-can forms) and that makes all the difference. Likewise, it’s 1.8% in ABV higher. That can’t be dismissed either. Nice, smoky, roasted barley, and hints of coffee. Still very drinkable–well, sippable at least–and no chance of getting a foam mustache.
However, I say the best thing about Extra Stout as opposed to the Draught is that your friends that visited Ireland once for a few days during college won’t be able to pontificate ad nauseum about how the Guinness in Dublin is so much better than the one you are currently drinking in America. And how the bartender–oh, shit! did you see what that IDIOT just did?!–doesn’t know how to do a “correct” pour. Guinness Extra Stout leaves no room for those annoying complaints and I love it for that.
Finally, not to get too profane–cuz that ain’t what we’re about here at The Vice Blog–but if you drink a ton of these like I did over the course of a Saturday, you will spend most of the next day on the toilet with a little Irishman’s revenge, a charcoal black enema constantly oozing out of you.
Turns out Guinness Extra Stout is indeed “good for you.” That is if you’re trying to clean out your entire insides and can’t afford a trip to the colonic spa.
A-
*Some might even say the Extra Stout’s not “real” either, the original recipe of Guinness said to be closer to 7% ABV.
