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December 16th, 2008 by Aaron Goldfarb | Filed under Brewer: Schneider, Country: Germany, Grade: A-, Style: Wheat (Hefeweizen).
8% ABV bottled
A friend who I trust said this was a world class beer, and with a top 100 Beer Advocate rating to back his lofty claim up, several bottles were procured.
This beer unexpectedly taught me a lot about beer connoisseurship. But not in the way you might expect. The first time I sampled this weizenbock–essentially a mix between a wheat beer and a dopplebock in the murky world of style classifications–was at the tail-end of a night of heavy drinking. I was not impressed. I thought it was bland, flavorless, uninspired. Another one of the many boring Reinheitsgebot purity law beers from out of Germany, I snickered to myself. I detected nothing noteworthy as I sipped it and was barely interested enough to even take notes. I jotted a few down in between doing whatever it is drunk people do at 2:00 AM, ultimately deciding to score this beer a C+.
Luckily, I was so backed up in beer reviews I never officially got to enter that into my blog. Let me stop for a second to answer the real beer geeks’–the ones that are sanctimoniously aghast right now–questions. No, I typically do not “officially” review quality beers when I am shitfaced. It’s not fair to myself, my blog, my millions of readers, or the brewery. I usually only review a beer if it is one of the first three or maybe four of my night. (Or morning if I’ve decided to say, “Fuck the world” and get snockered at 8:00 AM.) But as with many things, we humans are not exactly good at judging how drunk we are.
“I ain’t tha’ drunk, I can drive us.”
“Whadaya talkin’ bout? I’m not tipsy, I can totally work that chainsaw.”
“I’s a barely had any beers, a cours’ my dick still works.”
Likewise, I didn’t think I was that drunk at all when I first tried Aventinus. But the fact is, I must have been, and my beer-drinking senses must have likewise been totally FUBAR, for me to think this beer shitty upon our initial introduction.
Sometime later, with nothing else to drink in the house, I begrudgingly had to drink another bottle of Aventinus still sitting around in the back of the fridge with some healthy salad dressings everyone buys but no one ever uses. I was totally disinterested in the beer now, only drinking it to get the necessary proteins into my system. And by proteins I mean alcohol.
With the first sip I was floored. Whoa! Where was that shitty beer I’d had weeks ago?! This thing was amazing! I was sober and I was blown away. Smells of banana, cloves, and boozy alcohol. In addition to those flavors, an incredibly creamy and smooth wheat and yeast taste. Almost like a tripel with its primordial ooze of unfiltered and unfermented yeast. A glorious beer, unquestionably.
Perhaps I should become one of those nerds I so hate that lock themselves in a sensory deprivation chamber when sampling a new brew. Hmmm…wonder where I can find a guy to build a sensory deprivation chamber in Manhattan?
A-
