“He was a man who used vices to drain poisons out of his body rather than to saturate it.” Mario Puzo, The Last Don
Yesterday I woke up alone at 4:00 in the afternoon. I still had all my possessions on me. I hadn’t lost my cell phone, my wallet, even my dignity. This was quite astonishing as the night before had been my 30th birthday party and, you see, I am quite famous for losing all of the aforementioned–most notably the latter–on my big day. Why, most of my birthday party stories are too sordid, perverse, and transgressive for even me to tell. Don’t get me wrong, if I told some of these tales they would instantly catapult to the top of my “best of” section but I guess even I have limits.
I started Saturday afternoon with a few while still at home, eager to try a fresh bottle of HopSlam that Dirtyspeed over at Friday Night Beer had recently sent me. Currently the 26th “best” beer on planet earth, I found it deserves all the acclaim it gets as it is truly sublime. A state-of-the-art DIPA with added honey notes that really allows it to stand apart from most of the other great DIPAs on the market. A terrific bitter hoppiness yet still sweet due to the honey giving it barley wine characteristics somewhat. Smooth and creamy, boozy enough but damn drinkable, and with a nice mouthfeel, I absolutely loved this beer and immediately wished I had more. It’s fairly limited so if you have any friends in the states that stock Bell’s, implore them to send you some.
My party was held at Blind Tiger Ale House, considered by many to be the best beer bar in America. We had a great time but nothing particularly “blog-worthy” occurred which I think may have disappointed some who expected utter lunacy. That’s fine, though, you can’t force craziness. You can’t force fun. You can only go out, have some drinks, be happy, and be social. And we were, and I had a great time. From what I recall.
I suppose the most interesting thing at my party was that diverse friends of mine got to collude with each other. I run in many different circles that rarely mix so for one of the few–if not first–times various friends got to meet each other. And the topic most discussed was, “Is ____ Vice Blog story real?”
Several participants in the Hooker Lottery showed, almost six years exactly after that stunning event.
I had a great boozy time and my friends even reminded me of some other funny stories from our past that I should and will write up very soon.
I was still so hungover by Super Bowl time that I sat home by myself watching the game and drinking diet soda. Perhaps the first sober Super Bowl I’ve had since John Elway was playing.
*Ladies, he’s single. E-mail me your headshots if you’re interested and I’ll pass them onto the King.