Monthly Archives: March 2009

Avery Ale to the Chief

March 31, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | 17 Comments | Filed in Brewer: Avery, Country: America, Grade: A-, Style: IPA

The French Fry Rankings I got into a never resolved drunken argument with a buddy last week, and since I have a public forum and he doesn’t, I’ll now get the final, definitive word (in your face, GW!) My picks for the best french fries by style. 1.  The Curly Fry (seasoned or not)–Clearly the […]

North Coast Old Stock Ale (2008)

March 26, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | 5 Comments | Filed in Brewer: North Coast, Country: America, Grade: A-, Style: Old Ale

My Super Sweet Sixteen (Not Featuring Annoying Little Twats*), Part II Part I If this was 1982, the Columbia Broadcasting System’s coverage of the NCAA Tournament might be considered state of the art, but now, in an era in which I can watch Paula Dean and her many chins cook artery clogging yet surely delicious […]

Sierra Nevada Torpedo

March 25, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | 6 Comments | Filed in Brewer: Sierra Nevada, Country: America, Grade: A-/B+, Style: IPA

My Super Sweet Sixteen (Not Featuring Annoying Little Twats*) I went to the college with the best sports journalism program in the nation, but I never had any interest in the industry.  Nevertheless, my outsized ego still leads me to believe I’m a better analyst that any one in the field.  And, being that sports […]

Portsmouth Belgian Dubbel

March 24, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | 2 Comments | Filed in Brewer: Portsmouth, Country: America, Grade: B plus, Style: Dubbel

8% ABV bottled I don’t claim to be an expert at anything, save disappointing my parents, but my rampant autodidacticism has allowed me to become somewhat knowledgeable in quite a few fields.   Beer is one of them.  So is film.  Talking to women is yet another thing I seem to be fairly decent at.  And, […]

Surly Coffee Bender

March 19, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | 12 Comments | Filed in Brewer: Surly, Country: America, Grade: A-, Style: Brown Ale

5.1% ABV from a can Today, March Madness Thursday, is probably my favorite day of each calender year, assuming July 1st doesn’t all of the sudden become National Aaron/Scarlett Johansson/Megan Fox threesome day (observed). From the second the brackets are announced on Sunday night and Jay Bilas starts calmly, rationally, and wisely arguing with a […]

Flat Earth Winter Warlock

March 17, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | 26 Comments | Filed in Brewer: Flat Earth, Country: America, Grade: B plus, Style: Barley wine

9% ABV from a bomber I’m not sure if this will be a popular sentiment, but I fucking hate St. Patrick’s Day.  More specifically, I hate the buffoonery surrounding the faux-holiday.  Most specifically, I hate the buffoonery surrounding the faux-holiday celebrations in Manhattan. As early as daybreak, college dropouts from all over the east coast […]

Kate the Great

March 16, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | 10 Comments | Filed in Brewer: Portsmouth, Country: America, Grade: A plus, Style: Stout

9.5% ABV HIQ:  Hungover Intelligence Quotient I was slurring my words, unable to form complete sentences, a screwed up syntax, barely able to even move my mouth and tongue in the correct way to ejaculate words.  I had the most mild form of brain damage:  a massage hangover. Thursday was one of the more epic […]

Dogfish Head World Wide Stout

March 10, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | 16 Comments | Filed in Brewer: Dogfish Head, Country: America, Grade: A-, Style: Stout

18% ABV bottled My favorite line from “Fight Club”–the book, not the film, though I guess it somewhat appears in both media–is “The things you used to own, now they own you.”*  And that’s the way I’ve pretty much always lived my adult life.  In the most spartan way possible with not many more possessions […]

Schafly Reserve Barleywine (2007)

March 9, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | 10 Comments | Filed in Brewer: Saint Louis/Schlafly, Country: America, Grade: A regular, Style: Barley wine

10.2% ABV from a handsomely boxed 750 mL bottle “When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.”  -HST It was 3:15 AM as I drunkenly approached the bartender. “‘scuse me, you guys got a pair of scissors I can borrow?” Not even regarding my question the least bit oddly, the bartender thought to herself–“Hmmm…yeah, […]

Sierra Nevada Bigfoot Barleywine (2001)

March 6, 2009 by Aaron Goldfarb | No Comments | Filed in Brewer: Sierra Nevada, Country: America, Grade: A-, Style: Barley wine

9.6% ABV bottled A friend down in San Juan for the World Baseball Classic just sent me a text: “medalla light tastes like puerto rican bath water.” That got me thinking about good names for beers that (yet!) do not exist: PUERTO RICAN SHOWER ALE This high ABV ale tastes like cheap cologne because it’s […]